Last week I had this crazy revelation … my time at RELEVANT Magazine (a really pivotal and emotional rollercoaster but significant season in my life) was five years ago.
FIVE YEARS AGO.
That’s so crazy to think. That for such a brief time in my life, I picked up and moved across the country for what I called my “dream job” to be thrown in a crazy whirlwind of a job and then ripped away from it a year later.
All that and I still wouldn’t trade it for anything. Because it’s a part of who I am. A part of my story.
But then I found this journal entry I wrote right before that season ever started. Purging was the final act of obedience I needed to do to really trust God with this next right step.
Just wow. Reflecting on this is so good.
PLEASE NOTE: I couldn’t find the exact recording of Derek Webb’s song that I reference in the post. But I did find “Wedding Dress” which is soooo good in its own right. So I included that instead.
* * *
Saturday, 10 January 2009
i’m starting to purge everything.
i want to throw out everything of me that represents the past represents who i was years ago things that i’ve held on to
i want to let all that go
literally start fresh
i want to throw out everything that doesn’t satisfy me to the full to throw out what represents who i was years ago things i’ve held on to for no reason
i want to shred things that don’t matter anymore
with all the things changing, with the letting go to move forward i feel like Lot i feel like the Lord has told me to leave everything behind and not look back to go to a new land leave what is good for something that is even better
there’s a song that derek webb sang that is on my RELEVANT playlist he had sung it acoustic and said words like “sell your stock, sell your SUV” and i remember thinking in the past - “there’s no way i could do that! that’s all i have!” and here i am, standing a year later with a whole new paradigm thinking about what i would take with me not much last spring when i thought about moving i was trying to strategize how to transport my entire apartment down to florida now all i need are just a few belongings
i started fresh five years ago, i can start fresh again
5 Things Thursday (Photography Inspiration Edition)
Hey friends. I’ve been super out of it lately and I blame it on traveling. It really takes a lot out of you … I’m just barely fully in recovery mode.
Anyways - I noticed that everything I wanted to post about lately were actually about photography inspiration (which is a nice break away from TV and other life things). So yeah, we’ll just go with it.
1 I LOVE GLENN’S INSTAGRAM - I’ve been super obsessed lately with The Walking Dead (if you haven’t noticed) and so after the conclusion of the season I decided to finally Youtube interviews and do my fangirl duty to stalk the actors’ Instagram accounts.
I’m still a HUGE fan of Daryl (even though the one scene that Katie caught was of him eating a rat and cutting off a walker’s ear - that happened to be the exact moment I said he was hot). But I also love the Glenn & Maggie dynamic. They’re the ones that I would “ship” … if you get what I’m saying.
Anyways - Steve Yeun (who plays Glenn) has the BEST Instagrams! I think you should follow him.
2 ALSO THIS - Thanks to Moo.com, I’ve came across this lovely series by Austin Tott. He matched tiny pieces of hand-illustrated body art with dreamy backgrounds.
And I love stuff like this.
I need to do something like this. Some sort of personal project.
It’s going to happen.
3 I’VE DECIDED THAT I’M GOING TO MAKE SOME SIGNATURE PRINTS - Recently when I was on the very top floor of Powell’s (that’s where they keep all their photography books) I noticed a lovely photo that was framed and signed. And well I decided I wanted to do something like that.
When you’re lost in the world of custom portraits and photography assignments, sometimes you never create for just you. And well, I have a few favorite pieces that I think I’m going to start printing as signature prints.
I’m still in the culling phase of my book … might as well pick out some of my favorites for this too.
(ps - if you have any favorite prints of mine, please let me know!)
5 COLLECTIONS / MORE INSPIRATIONAL PHOTOGS - I love the idea on cohesive works among photographers. One that I’ve been found on Skillshare is Bethany Olson. She has an amazing eye to create natural-lit portraits with an exploration feel to it all.
And not too far from Bethany Olson is Cory Staudacher (I’ve always known him as @withhearts from Instagram). His work is awesome.
And not far from him is Kyle Steed. Also amazing work (mostly illustrations). And from there … you get so many more artists. And I love that.
And honestly, it just keeps going.
I love that it’s never really competition when you’re just creating art.
That’s what I have to keep at. Passion projects keep this whole thing centered. Otherwise work just begins to suck the joy out of it. I’m praying that I keep finding new inspiration.
Anyways. That’s it. Bye!
I’ve got to go watch me some Parenthood! RYAN YORK IS BACK … queue the tears. And what’s going to happen to Joel & Julia?! AHHHH.
MONDAY MUSIC SHARE (ON A THURSDAY): Tove Lo - Out Of Mind
I’ve been so out of it lately. I guess that’s what happens when you travel.
Anyways, saw this artist on Nylon and checked out her stuff. She is awesome. It kind of has that raw, dance, badass, slick pop sound. Mixed in with some real life experience lyrics that document the process of going through a breakup. And well, if Adele’s "21" can attest to what heartbreak does to music … you’re in for a treat with this Swedish song bird.
Seriously. Take the new EP "Truth Serum" for a spin. You’ll love it.
I am such a slacker but really there’s no excuse. I should have gotten this done so much sooner, but whatever. End of the week update!
Here are 5+ things going on with me and/or the world at large:
1 HOW HIMYM SHOULD HAVE ENDED - So if you haven’t heard yet, the world is revolting against the end of How I Met Your Mother. I may be over exaggerating. But I’m still kind of reeling from the way they wrapped up one of my all-time favorite shows.
It’s so crazy how much I cried within just minutes of the finale. I can’t go into detail because I hate spoilers*, but the show could’ve been SO GREAT and they could’ve just made things amazing for all the viewership. But they threw in a couple twists and honestly speaking, it made me hate the ending.
Apparently, I wasn’t the only one. An angry fan created a 3-minute video from the show’s footage and cut it in a way of how it should have ended. I can’t post it here because it’s been pulled from Youtube, but still. I’m going to choose that ending always. The actual finale is stupid.
(I mean, I get it. Story twists and stuff. Etc. Whatever. Ugh.)
(DISCLAIMER: I love love love the series. Don’t let this deter you from watching the show if you haven’t yet)
*both the TV kind and the ones you put on cars. Gross.
2 I’VE BEEN BINGING ON THE WALKING DEAD - Another finale that has got my brain in a complete tizzy is The Walking Dead. I’ve been seriously fascinated by this show and all its character development and such.
But Terminus?! WTF. Seriously, if it is what I think it is, that’s just crazy.
Anyways, I decided to start it from the beginning on Netflix and I just flew through it. SO GOOD.
3 PALEYFEST FEATURE - This will be my last thing about TV, I promise. But I wanted to feature this on a 5TT a couple weeks ago but I’m a slacker. But I was featured on CO Everywhere. Check it!
4 TV LESS TUESDAY FAIL / HALF ASS LENT - So earlier this year I mentioned how I’d try out TV Less Tuesdays with TJ Mousetis (owner of Walk In Love). Dude, I did not know how HARD that would be.
And then I started Lent and gave up a few things and have seriously noticed that’s just as equally SUPER HARD too. In all honestly, it’s not because I want to do these things it’s because I keep forgetting. Like I just forget that I made a commitment. And then on the flip side, I’m not replacing it with the good things that I had planned.
Taking the time to detox crap out of my life shouldn’t be done halfway. And that’s where I’ve been. Half-assing it when I should be seriously spending more time with God and more time putting good things into my life.
It’ll get better. Still growing. Still learning here.
5 MORE PODCASTS - Well, in efforts to not listen to secular music during lent I’ve resorted to listening to more podcasts. I love worship music, folks, but I can only handle so much. I hope that’s not a bad thing.
Anyways. i’ve been listening to a few new podcasts: Improv 4 Humans, select things that featured Rachel Cruze (Dave Ramsey’s daughter - she’s awesome), and a few other random things that have to deal with business development.
I miss the Kidd Kraddick Show.
If you have any suggestions on good podcasts to listen to, please let me know!
6 NERDWAX - So if you haven’t heard yet, Nerdwax launched on Kickstarter earlier this week with the goal of $5000 to start its first production run. And they hit that goal within 12 hours!
It’s been outrageous how much it just blew up and how many people have been backing up this project. As of right now they’re at $12,308!
The great thing about Nerdwax is that 1) it’s an amazing new product that definitely is a need (my glasses fall down all the time - especially when I roll gyoza!) and 2) it supports some friends of mine that I knew from my time in Texas. They are wonderful people with the most beautiful family.
7 CURRENTLY IN PDX - Lastly, I’m in Portland! Which is probably the big reason I’m able to sit down and write this post. There’s something about getting out of town to clear your head. That’s what this is about. Well, at least part of it.
I’m spending the weekend here with one of my friends. We’re going to hit up all the things that PDX has to offer and just catch up on life. And do some tax-free shopping! I’m excited.
If you have any suggestions of what to do/where to go while here, please let me know!!